Currently Watching The 40-Year-Old Virgin (Unrated Widescreen Edition) see related

what up, what up kidsssss

alright, so obviosuly i dont update anymore..which im sorrry. i try, but i never use my xanga anymore. anyway i just thought i would update this last time, and kind of a "good-bye" i guess you could call it?

so anywayyy- friends: AMAZING. yess we all still have our times, but hey..i love them, all of them. i have been hangin out, and meeting some new people, and gettin closer with new people, and groups..which im totally stoked about. its kinda like, im startin to meet some people, that are more like me, and i have so much fun withh! ahh i love it. anyway this catagory it great.
ashlea, des, me --were tightttt. haha
me and my bffff LIBBBY. we went on a date that nite. aw!
M I L F S -child dev. babiesss.. suckss

<3 love life <3 -hmm..not a boy still, but ive got my eye on a few..like ive said before, everytime i start to like someone, somethin happens that stops us from being able to be together..which totally and completly suckss... but oh well--everything happens for a reason right? ive grown, and figured out alot about myself, since ive been single..which is always a good thing. 1st day of school -being me

familyy- ehh..we have our times, but were still doin so much better than we used to bee -oh and did i mention, i love my big sister more than anything in the entire worldd!!

 haha.. dorks
 us in NY..

so anyway..lifes been good. and this will probally be one of my last entries.. sorrry guys. but if yall get a "myspace" or a "facebook" then deff. let me know, because i have bothh.. computer nerd? uhh ya :)

how can you just walk on by
without one tear in your eye
dont you have the slightest feelings left for me
maybe thats just your way of dealing with the pain
forgetting everything between our rise and fall
like we never loved at all
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

cHeLsEyLyNn1113: how are you!?
Jmahan828: good how are u
cHeLsEyLyNn1113: im alive.
Jmahan828: thats awesome
Jmahan828: be happy or ill beat u up
cHeLsEyLyNn1113: ya.. be happy. im tryin
Jmahan828: good
Jmahan828: try harder
cHeLsEyLyNn1113: i am..beieve me
cHeLsEyLyNn1113: im not really un'happy. im just not satisfied.
Jmahan828: with what
cHeLsEyLyNn1113: boys/friends/school.
Jmahan828: well in 5 years they arent gonna mean shit so fuck em
Jmahan828: cept school
cHeLsEyLyNn1113: lol.. i love u josh u crack me up
Jmahan828: so many hings are gonna change in the next year alone so look foward to the changes
Jmahan828: well i love u and in 5 years i still will
Jmahan828: so dont fuck me
cHeLsEyLyNn1113:
Jmahan828: well u can
Jmahan828: but
cHeLsEyLyNn1113: haha!
Jmahan828: u kno
cHeLsEyLyNn1113: hahaha!!

that basically made me whole day.

SO...LIFE IS STILL GOOD

BUT I REALIZED ALOT ABOUT MYSELF LATLY.


X im so scared of commitment.
X i find the bad in just about everything, instead of looking at all the good
X i get caught up, and fall for boys that i probally shouldnt.
X im always happy, but im never satisfied.
X i dont like asperages, i always just said i did, cuz my sister liked it
X i dont like when people put theyre feet on me
X i love alot of weird bands that some people dont like
X i constantly want a boy in my life. which is gay, cuz they cause most of my drama.
X i hurt alot of people, that i honestly dont intend to hurt </3
X i want to do make'up, and fashion, and hair when im older. i never knew that.
ive realized also, that i dont xanga very much anymore. i have a facebook now. and im obsessed with it. so i might not be updating as often. sorry.


I LOVE YOU ALL.

UPDATE.

THANKSGIVING BREAK
tuesday-tt, then kara's, then brocks, swam, and ate like a million cookies (brock's mom's cookies kicked ass) anyway then back to kara's with des, kara, and julia. FUN night. i love all those girls so much.
wednesday-hungout with the girls all day. julia left then came back after me, kara, and des got ready. we all went to CICI'S and ate, then went ice skating which was lots of fun... i only fell like 2 times! GO CHELS, then i went home after that. good night.
thuRsdAy-HAPPY THANKSGIVING. FOOD, FAMILY, FRIENDS, BEN, FIRE, "KEMPS", PIE. wonderful night.
friday- went shoppin with des for a while, then came home, changed into sweats and went to libb's to watch "war of the worlds" (weird but good) and orderd pizza. fun lounge night. i missed those so much with libb. so it was good to finally have one!, came home and watched a 3 hour DVD w/ derek and shea (sis, and her boyfriend) which was alot of fun. derek and me get along really well, which is a plus, and i love and adore my sister obviously. so that was fun!
saturday- hungout and cleaned all day with shea. then kara came over, we got ready and went bowling with all the sophmore boys! that was ALOT of fun. then me and kara had a junk'food/scary movie/girl talk night! woohoo. i love kara so much. she's freakin adorable! anyway that was fun.. we stayed up till like 3 watchin "NEXT" haha.
sunday-church, zona rosa, hungout, went to britt's and watched "house of wax" good movie. fun to see britt. i hadnt seen her all break.

--->so basically this break was relaxing, fun, exciting, boring, all mixed together. but it was really good. i saw alot of people that i love to death, but i also didnt see some people that i love which was kinda a down'fall. but hopefully i'll be seeing them soon (cough, stace, cough) haha. but seriously, i need to hangout with some people that i havent in a while! its way past needed.

BOYS- i've realized. i want you. i always have. but i just now realized it. there will be some difficulties, but im willing to do that because i want to work through anything that happens or comes our way. i hope we can do it together. so obviously there's a boy that i really care about. so hmm.. enough said.

FRIENDS- well, i love them all , but there are some that i have 2nd thoughts about sometimes, and there are some who i despreatly need to hangout with, i miss some of them, some i just dont have a desire to work at, and other's i dont even realize theyre gone. its funny how friends, come and go, but there's always that one small group of girls, who are always there to catch me when i fall. i love you all so much.

I JUST LOVE LIFE. like sometimes, i sit back and realize how i used to be, and just to see how much i've changed, and how happy i am now, i just wouldnt have my life any other way! sure i still have bad days, drama, and bullshit, but thats just life. ahh im happy!

well im out. leave me some comments <3